Saturday, November 6, 2010

And Now, an Excerpt From the Holy Scriptures*

A passage from the words of Christ, as recorded in chapter 19, Gospel of Matthew*, verses 16-21.

19.  And, behold, one came and said unto him, Good Master, what good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life?

And He said unto him, Why callest thou me good? there is none good but one, that is, God: but if thou wilt enter into life, keep the commandments.

20.  He saith unto him, Which? Jesus said:

Thou shalt do no murder, unless it take the guise of an illegal war based on falsities.  (Verily, get thee to force others to do thy oppressive business.);

Thou shalt not commit adultery more than two score times;

Thou shalt not steal, unless it be from stockholders and taxpayers;

Thou shalt not bear false witness, unless it aids thy lust for power;

Honor thy father and thy mother, unless they vote Democrat, and;

Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself…with the following exclusions: foreigners, the GAY, kikes, wops, micks, welfare queens, intellectuals, integrators, vegetarians, anybody “brown”, (hath I mentioned The GAY?) l-l-l-l-ib’rals, people who fail to buy American, pansies, those thou dost deem “less” than thee, socialists, those that drive a hybrid or compost, (I hath covered The GAY, yes?) and most of all: black presidents.


21.  Lo, I say unto thee, it is easier for such as these to overcome the security system of  a BMW or take yer jobs than be loved by the Father…even though He made them, too.

Go forth and doest thou likewise and thou shalt have an eternal place at the seat of power.





* Tea Bagger Edition, abridged and corrected.

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